New posters often find some of the language used by the regulars in the QC forum mystifying. In order to make things easier here is a glossary of some terms used as well as a history of how that term came to be used.
A section describing the inhabitants of the snug is also being prepared and will be available when starrock is back from her globe trotting.
This is very much a work in progress and additions, suggestions or corrections are welcome from those who have a good memory.
A section describing the inhabitants of the snug is also being prepared and will be available when starrock is back from her globe trotting.
This is very much a work in progress and additions, suggestions or corrections are welcome from those who have a good memory.
ARSE
(Ѡ lit. area of human anatomy encompassing nates, and nate-cleft, vulgar) In olden times, before the great CiF upheaval of 2015, participation was open to all comers. Comment, as it were, was Freer. Even the type-shy lurker could express an opinion by clicking R for Recommend on a comment, thus boosting its weight in the world. A Recommend signalled anything from an appreciative chuckle over a well-turned phrase, to solidarity with a heartfelt cause, or sympathy with some human pain. As this process was anonymous, regular denizens would sometimes back this up with a comment such as, “Hear, Hear! I gave you an R for that!” and it was very quickly noticed that the plural of R – Rs – bore an uncanny resemblance to that favourite word of cheeky aunts and schoolchildren everywhere, viz. ARSE. At the same time, it was discovered by people who might well have had better things to do, that a visitor to the site who was not signed-in could bestow ARSE in quantities limited only by their own ability to click and refresh. The Graun has since tightened its ARSE – replacing the R with a ↑ and restricting its use to registered users.
In any case, many QCCers are very fond of the word ARSE and use it whenever they get a chance.
Bum-biting poetry
Early denizens, finding themselves unable to offer each other the cups of tea normally essential to British social bonding activity, sometimes took to offering the group gifts of poetry. Most common were the limerick and the haiku; forms, it transpired, which could be surprisingly good attracting lavish ARSE for wit, rhyme, sentiment and scansion, or surprisingly bad when one or more of those elements was missing. Efforts in the latter category rarely went by without at least a little pity-ARSE for trying, but nonetheless proved to be an extreme irritant to some. Tilting at windmills perhaps, one day Fyodora was provoked by one such offering to decry, “You people wouldn't know decent poetry if it bit you on the bum!”. This inevitably led to an avalanche of limericks of every water, in defence of the right to enjoy the imperfect. The tradition of limericks and haikus continues to this day, and has been supplemented often with real bum-biting stuff, at least three of whose poets (BrianClark, CivSum and FerenjiNan) have been published. Indeed Fyodora herself has been known to contribute and is widely supposed to bear tooth marks on the nates.
CAKE
A baked confection of flour, butter, sugar and eggs in various combinations, often with further ingredients to lift the ennui. It has acquired ALLCAPS and Italics and a certain currency in the Caff, many of whose denizens are fine bakers in their physical lives. Thus CAKE is proffered in sympathy and in celebration, as a welcome to newcomers or as a peace offering to those of longer standing.
Candlebra
The fragrant MrsMatisse, waxing lyrical on the subject of candelabras, conjured a typo so delicious that it was quickly adopted into the QCC lexicon, represented by THIS extraordinary item. It is used by some as a name for the Caff.
Cheat
Sister button to CHECK, allows the befuddled solver to give up and have the correct solution entered automatically. CHEAT has been re-educated and renamed a less judgemental REVEAL. See also FriedFish method.
CiF
Comment is Free, The Guardian's name for reader participation in the space it provides beneath selected articles and – crucially – the crosswords. Aka Carping is Fun.
Czech
Homonym of CHECK, one of the buttons available to crossword solvers who find themselves enmeshed in the grid, unbelieving or unsure of a solution. When pressed, any mistaken letters that have been entered are removed, allowing the solver to nod her head wisely and claim that she knew all along it was spelt like that. This has lead on to referring to the use of Myrtle, the name given to a SKODA car when QCC patrons use (or over use) the cezch button.
EPT
abr. Easy Peasy Tax. Attempt to stop overt displays of early-morning smugness, by demanding entertaining compensation for simple boasting posts. The name comes from the classic "Easy Peasy", but applies equally to "Piece of Cake", "2 minutes & 16 seconds, really setter?", "What is this, The Sun, FFS?", which alone add little to the richness of splother. When accompanied by a 'tax' of e.g. interesting links, poetry, artwork or virtual food, according to the means and ability of the poster, the QCC becomes a better place for all.
Etui
Fr. Receptacle. A word much beloved of crossword setters, more for its ability to cross other words than for any inherent beauty or usefulness in other spheres. See also ewer, nates, rhea, ennui, etc
Ewers
Jugs. See etui.
FriedFish Method
aka MeFFod, described by the veteran QCCer on discovering how difficult it was to type in solutions one letter at a time in early tablet versions of the crossword. The honest solver looks at the clue and the grid, makes a guess and then presses CHEAT. If the guess and the solution coincide, he is entitled to a certain smugness. However, the frustration and disappointment when they do not coincide are not to be underestimated. (The dishonest solver, or the solver given over to gay abandon will suffer none of this angst and can not be said to be using the Meffod.)
Graun, Grauniad -
Nates
Buttocks. See Etui
QCC
abr. Quick Crossword Cafe, aka the Caff, aka the Candlebra. The space beneath the Guardian Crosswords was kindly provided for cruciverbalists to comment and exchange views on cluing, parsing, diacritics and the finer points of what goes in to a black and white grid. While the Cryptic crossword provides plenty of scope for such musings, the Quick is rather more straightforward. Quick commentators soon found themselves straying into wider discussion, bringing personal circumstances, anecdote, poetry, surrealism, recipes, music and all sorts into the mix, then enjoying and regularly seeking out each other's company. Many dull and lonely corners of the world were brightened and something of a community evolved. Prolific early poster Melmoth mused one day about how we all imagined the comments section – he saw it as a friendly cafe, others as a pub, others as a social club. PeterKelly made an attempt to map out this place, adding in many flights of fancy as they were invented. (See picture on the Homepage) Some regular posters continue to think of it as a cafe, and a place to socialise. Advice is sought and offered, recipes and tips are shared, creative talent sees the light of day. Outside of the QCC, many real friendships have been formed, with Guardian crossword commenters meeting up and offering each other hospitality in the UK, Australia, New Zealand, India and the USA. This can confuse people who go to the comments section to point out, for example, that the clue is surely verb but the solution is a noun, and some consider it inappropriate or cliquey and rail against it. QCC is in short a virtual space which has far surpassed its intended use, to offer company, laughter, conversation, advice, real support and true friendship to many people who have needed it.
Rhea
S. American ostrich, coincidentally a homonym for rear. See etui.
Smellings
Slips of the finger are rarely a good thing, but occasionally one happens on the keyboard which leads to a pleasing typographical error such as this, for spellings. It has passed, along with all forms of the verb to smell in place of to spell, into the QCC jargon, affording several opportunities daily for faintly-muffled fart-gags.
Splother
The untrammelled ramblings of QCC denizens. Due to the natural limit of interesting things to say about the crossword itself (see cryptic comments for evidence of this), Caff visitors tend to digress into musings and recollections prompted by a clue or a solution; rants about their daily lot; surreal prose; total non-sequiturs; poetry; recipes; hints, tips and much besides. Occasionally one such comment causes a ripple in the pool and The collective term for this is splother. It is both an outlet for creativity and an invaluable source of camaraderie and information, it blesseth him that gives and him that takes.
Welsh Granny
The archetypal wise crone, Welsh Granny was brought in by a poster who stopped dropping into the Caff. He forgot to take his granny with him and she has stayed on by mutual agreement to oversee the Snug and offer the respite of a warm bosom, a soothing balm and fresh barm brack to the barmy splotherer. She is not to be trifled with; fools she will gladly suffer but malice of any hue is quietly 'dealt with.
27d
The Shangri-La of crossword clues is only visible to those with a deep and abiding affinity with the workings of splother. It is a stepping stone out of the material world into abstruse, off-topic realms and as such the comments it provokes often invite opprobrium. Citing the clue is a sign of appeasement to moderators and the uninitiated, acknowledging that the poster is in transgressive territory. Some believe 27d is just a red herring, an attempt to point the unobservant reader in the wrong direction while the poster runs the other way in a flight of fancy, but that is what they want you to believe.
(Ѡ lit. area of human anatomy encompassing nates, and nate-cleft, vulgar) In olden times, before the great CiF upheaval of 2015, participation was open to all comers. Comment, as it were, was Freer. Even the type-shy lurker could express an opinion by clicking R for Recommend on a comment, thus boosting its weight in the world. A Recommend signalled anything from an appreciative chuckle over a well-turned phrase, to solidarity with a heartfelt cause, or sympathy with some human pain. As this process was anonymous, regular denizens would sometimes back this up with a comment such as, “Hear, Hear! I gave you an R for that!” and it was very quickly noticed that the plural of R – Rs – bore an uncanny resemblance to that favourite word of cheeky aunts and schoolchildren everywhere, viz. ARSE. At the same time, it was discovered by people who might well have had better things to do, that a visitor to the site who was not signed-in could bestow ARSE in quantities limited only by their own ability to click and refresh. The Graun has since tightened its ARSE – replacing the R with a ↑ and restricting its use to registered users.
In any case, many QCCers are very fond of the word ARSE and use it whenever they get a chance.
Bum-biting poetry
Early denizens, finding themselves unable to offer each other the cups of tea normally essential to British social bonding activity, sometimes took to offering the group gifts of poetry. Most common were the limerick and the haiku; forms, it transpired, which could be surprisingly good attracting lavish ARSE for wit, rhyme, sentiment and scansion, or surprisingly bad when one or more of those elements was missing. Efforts in the latter category rarely went by without at least a little pity-ARSE for trying, but nonetheless proved to be an extreme irritant to some. Tilting at windmills perhaps, one day Fyodora was provoked by one such offering to decry, “You people wouldn't know decent poetry if it bit you on the bum!”. This inevitably led to an avalanche of limericks of every water, in defence of the right to enjoy the imperfect. The tradition of limericks and haikus continues to this day, and has been supplemented often with real bum-biting stuff, at least three of whose poets (BrianClark, CivSum and FerenjiNan) have been published. Indeed Fyodora herself has been known to contribute and is widely supposed to bear tooth marks on the nates.
CAKE
A baked confection of flour, butter, sugar and eggs in various combinations, often with further ingredients to lift the ennui. It has acquired ALLCAPS and Italics and a certain currency in the Caff, many of whose denizens are fine bakers in their physical lives. Thus CAKE is proffered in sympathy and in celebration, as a welcome to newcomers or as a peace offering to those of longer standing.
Candlebra
The fragrant MrsMatisse, waxing lyrical on the subject of candelabras, conjured a typo so delicious that it was quickly adopted into the QCC lexicon, represented by THIS extraordinary item. It is used by some as a name for the Caff.
Cheat
Sister button to CHECK, allows the befuddled solver to give up and have the correct solution entered automatically. CHEAT has been re-educated and renamed a less judgemental REVEAL. See also FriedFish method.
CiF
Comment is Free, The Guardian's name for reader participation in the space it provides beneath selected articles and – crucially – the crosswords. Aka Carping is Fun.
Czech
Homonym of CHECK, one of the buttons available to crossword solvers who find themselves enmeshed in the grid, unbelieving or unsure of a solution. When pressed, any mistaken letters that have been entered are removed, allowing the solver to nod her head wisely and claim that she knew all along it was spelt like that. This has lead on to referring to the use of Myrtle, the name given to a SKODA car when QCC patrons use (or over use) the cezch button.
EPT
abr. Easy Peasy Tax. Attempt to stop overt displays of early-morning smugness, by demanding entertaining compensation for simple boasting posts. The name comes from the classic "Easy Peasy", but applies equally to "Piece of Cake", "2 minutes & 16 seconds, really setter?", "What is this, The Sun, FFS?", which alone add little to the richness of splother. When accompanied by a 'tax' of e.g. interesting links, poetry, artwork or virtual food, according to the means and ability of the poster, the QCC becomes a better place for all.
Etui
Fr. Receptacle. A word much beloved of crossword setters, more for its ability to cross other words than for any inherent beauty or usefulness in other spheres. See also ewer, nates, rhea, ennui, etc
Ewers
Jugs. See etui.
FriedFish Method
aka MeFFod, described by the veteran QCCer on discovering how difficult it was to type in solutions one letter at a time in early tablet versions of the crossword. The honest solver looks at the clue and the grid, makes a guess and then presses CHEAT. If the guess and the solution coincide, he is entitled to a certain smugness. However, the frustration and disappointment when they do not coincide are not to be underestimated. (The dishonest solver, or the solver given over to gay abandon will suffer none of this angst and can not be said to be using the Meffod.)
Graun, Grauniad -
Nates
Buttocks. See Etui
QCC
abr. Quick Crossword Cafe, aka the Caff, aka the Candlebra. The space beneath the Guardian Crosswords was kindly provided for cruciverbalists to comment and exchange views on cluing, parsing, diacritics and the finer points of what goes in to a black and white grid. While the Cryptic crossword provides plenty of scope for such musings, the Quick is rather more straightforward. Quick commentators soon found themselves straying into wider discussion, bringing personal circumstances, anecdote, poetry, surrealism, recipes, music and all sorts into the mix, then enjoying and regularly seeking out each other's company. Many dull and lonely corners of the world were brightened and something of a community evolved. Prolific early poster Melmoth mused one day about how we all imagined the comments section – he saw it as a friendly cafe, others as a pub, others as a social club. PeterKelly made an attempt to map out this place, adding in many flights of fancy as they were invented. (See picture on the Homepage) Some regular posters continue to think of it as a cafe, and a place to socialise. Advice is sought and offered, recipes and tips are shared, creative talent sees the light of day. Outside of the QCC, many real friendships have been formed, with Guardian crossword commenters meeting up and offering each other hospitality in the UK, Australia, New Zealand, India and the USA. This can confuse people who go to the comments section to point out, for example, that the clue is surely verb but the solution is a noun, and some consider it inappropriate or cliquey and rail against it. QCC is in short a virtual space which has far surpassed its intended use, to offer company, laughter, conversation, advice, real support and true friendship to many people who have needed it.
Rhea
S. American ostrich, coincidentally a homonym for rear. See etui.
Smellings
Slips of the finger are rarely a good thing, but occasionally one happens on the keyboard which leads to a pleasing typographical error such as this, for spellings. It has passed, along with all forms of the verb to smell in place of to spell, into the QCC jargon, affording several opportunities daily for faintly-muffled fart-gags.
Splother
The untrammelled ramblings of QCC denizens. Due to the natural limit of interesting things to say about the crossword itself (see cryptic comments for evidence of this), Caff visitors tend to digress into musings and recollections prompted by a clue or a solution; rants about their daily lot; surreal prose; total non-sequiturs; poetry; recipes; hints, tips and much besides. Occasionally one such comment causes a ripple in the pool and The collective term for this is splother. It is both an outlet for creativity and an invaluable source of camaraderie and information, it blesseth him that gives and him that takes.
Welsh Granny
The archetypal wise crone, Welsh Granny was brought in by a poster who stopped dropping into the Caff. He forgot to take his granny with him and she has stayed on by mutual agreement to oversee the Snug and offer the respite of a warm bosom, a soothing balm and fresh barm brack to the barmy splotherer. She is not to be trifled with; fools she will gladly suffer but malice of any hue is quietly 'dealt with.
27d
The Shangri-La of crossword clues is only visible to those with a deep and abiding affinity with the workings of splother. It is a stepping stone out of the material world into abstruse, off-topic realms and as such the comments it provokes often invite opprobrium. Citing the clue is a sign of appeasement to moderators and the uninitiated, acknowledging that the poster is in transgressive territory. Some believe 27d is just a red herring, an attempt to point the unobservant reader in the wrong direction while the poster runs the other way in a flight of fancy, but that is what they want you to believe.
Chef
keeps the kitchen open daily, running it with the help of many others. Those Who Serve include staff, managers, bakers, cocktail enthusiasts, food deliverers, juke box technicians....over the years QCC diners spontaneously added Welsh Granny, a JCB driver, snooker players, limerick writers, and a whole cast from Lesser Drivelling including a taxi driver whose vehicle smells of pig.
diners
everyone who is sitting around doing the crossword (not 'solvers' or 'commenters' or 'readers' or 'splotherers'). Word refers to all guests on the QCC thread, across continents, time zones, and across days or weeks or years.
haping
verb originally penned by Karankooks, who joined the Crozzer and thread to improve his English. Embarrassment at his own blunder soon threatened to cause him to sign out, so we quickly rallied round and remarked that we quate lake haping.
Haping is always useful as it can be added to virtually any sentence, given the ghastly state of the world, broadly speaking.
meat safe
a legendary cupboard equipped with perforated zinc door, which is never locked. Hugh Stephenson, the Head Quick Crossword Honcho, gets placed in there as convenient.
not cross buns
self explanatory; have been baked in desperation after particularly quarrelsome exchanges, to calm everybody down. Thanks to Backstagebear for these.
seaweed dancing
a kind of Tai Chi, suitable for discerning diners.
skipping rhyme
carefree 4-line children's exercise to start the day.
One of the earliest versions was written to Brian, whose serious sonnets were regularly leaving him wide open to critique from Fyodora.
What's the time, half past 9
Hang your Sonnet out on line.
When Fluffy Dora comes along,
Get your cast-iron knickers on.
Another morning ritual = typical exchanges between English speakers, projecting their psychic and sexual states into weather formulae, politely avoiding telling each other the exact problem.
[e.g.] Hello! What a night!
Frightful, wasn't it? Such a din -
Oooh, that wind, yes!
It's coming from a really cold quarter.
Yup! Time for the Long Johns! [&.c]
sky news
contributions about spectacular clouds we are seeing, sometimes with dropbox links to photographs, usually of a dawn or dusk and some silhouetted rooftops or furrin beach scene. A selection of QCC pictures can be seen HERE.
triping
term coined by Melmoth, pre-splother era and with similar meaning; commonly seen in conjunction with erra, which is used when you wish to get the Pedants off your back having posted carelessly.
keeps the kitchen open daily, running it with the help of many others. Those Who Serve include staff, managers, bakers, cocktail enthusiasts, food deliverers, juke box technicians....over the years QCC diners spontaneously added Welsh Granny, a JCB driver, snooker players, limerick writers, and a whole cast from Lesser Drivelling including a taxi driver whose vehicle smells of pig.
diners
everyone who is sitting around doing the crossword (not 'solvers' or 'commenters' or 'readers' or 'splotherers'). Word refers to all guests on the QCC thread, across continents, time zones, and across days or weeks or years.
haping
verb originally penned by Karankooks, who joined the Crozzer and thread to improve his English. Embarrassment at his own blunder soon threatened to cause him to sign out, so we quickly rallied round and remarked that we quate lake haping.
Haping is always useful as it can be added to virtually any sentence, given the ghastly state of the world, broadly speaking.
meat safe
a legendary cupboard equipped with perforated zinc door, which is never locked. Hugh Stephenson, the Head Quick Crossword Honcho, gets placed in there as convenient.
not cross buns
self explanatory; have been baked in desperation after particularly quarrelsome exchanges, to calm everybody down. Thanks to Backstagebear for these.
seaweed dancing
a kind of Tai Chi, suitable for discerning diners.
skipping rhyme
carefree 4-line children's exercise to start the day.
One of the earliest versions was written to Brian, whose serious sonnets were regularly leaving him wide open to critique from Fyodora.
What's the time, half past 9
Hang your Sonnet out on line.
When Fluffy Dora comes along,
Get your cast-iron knickers on.
Another morning ritual = typical exchanges between English speakers, projecting their psychic and sexual states into weather formulae, politely avoiding telling each other the exact problem.
[e.g.] Hello! What a night!
Frightful, wasn't it? Such a din -
Oooh, that wind, yes!
It's coming from a really cold quarter.
Yup! Time for the Long Johns! [&.c]
sky news
contributions about spectacular clouds we are seeing, sometimes with dropbox links to photographs, usually of a dawn or dusk and some silhouetted rooftops or furrin beach scene. A selection of QCC pictures can be seen HERE.
triping
term coined by Melmoth, pre-splother era and with similar meaning; commonly seen in conjunction with erra, which is used when you wish to get the Pedants off your back having posted carelessly.
FRENCHIES
The word is derived from the French for France as in “Vive La Frenchie” and we have reason to believe it was first coined by one Baroness Orczy.
Frenchies appear in a wide variety of situations and in many different guises so it is essential to be vigilant or ‘en garde’ as we say locally.
They are particularly adept at sneaking into the crossword grid without serving due notice. Some of them are very crude and commonplace whereas others are much more obscure and can sneak through the defences of decency.
The editors don’t intend to list them all here as there is insufficient space allocated.
Vous avez été averti!
NUDISTS
The confines of the Caff are occasionally host to a group of nudists who are in the unsavoury habit of leaving items of clothing scattered over the furniture.
Whilst not appearing to be prudish the management would like to point out that they provide coat-hangers suitable for all shapes and sizes of coloured apparel. We also have installed, at great expense, a ‘Reveal All’ button for the out-and-out exhibitionists so no one can say we haven’t catered for their requirements. All that we ask is that they tidy up afterwards.
The word is derived from the French for France as in “Vive La Frenchie” and we have reason to believe it was first coined by one Baroness Orczy.
Frenchies appear in a wide variety of situations and in many different guises so it is essential to be vigilant or ‘en garde’ as we say locally.
They are particularly adept at sneaking into the crossword grid without serving due notice. Some of them are very crude and commonplace whereas others are much more obscure and can sneak through the defences of decency.
The editors don’t intend to list them all here as there is insufficient space allocated.
Vous avez été averti!
NUDISTS
The confines of the Caff are occasionally host to a group of nudists who are in the unsavoury habit of leaving items of clothing scattered over the furniture.
Whilst not appearing to be prudish the management would like to point out that they provide coat-hangers suitable for all shapes and sizes of coloured apparel. We also have installed, at great expense, a ‘Reveal All’ button for the out-and-out exhibitionists so no one can say we haven’t catered for their requirements. All that we ask is that they tidy up afterwards.